The Taco Cleanse
by Wes Allison, Stephanie Bogdanich, Molly R. Frisinger and Jessica Morris
As the foreword to The Taco Cleanse explains, cleanses are ‘socially acceptable starvation disguised as health’ that
‘demand you choke down lemon juice swirled with cayenne pepper and your tears so that you can lose those last five
pounds.’ In other words, they are ‘the f***ing worst.’
There’s just one exception: one cleanse that is more like the f***ing best. This cleanse will help you forge a new path of wellness and self-discovery that you’ll want to stay on for the rest of your life. It will increase the glow in your face and forehead, provide an uplifting sensation in your core chakra, stimulate your nocturnal imagination, and retroactively prevent hangovers.
It’s satisfying, scientific, and best of all, simple: all of your meals must contain tacos.That’s right, it’s the #TacoCleanse. The masterminds behind The Taco Cleanse have put together a thorough introduction to the Tao of Taco that includes quizzes (‘What kind of taco eater are you?’), exercises (‘Help the guacamole find the taco’), inspirational ‘quotations’ (‘Eighty per cent of success is eating tacos’ –Woody Allen), and, of course, recipes: from the Wake & Shake Scramble Taco to Beer-Marinated Grilled Vegetables to Waffle Tacos (canine chef Dinger McPuppenstein even contributes a Dog Taco).
Every recipe happens to be vegan, but this cleanse is NOT for vegans only: it’s for anyone who experiences recurring
feelings of hunger on a daily basis, frequently lacks access to eating utensils such as forks or chopsticks, and tilts their head to the left while inserting food into their mouth. Does that describe you? Then it’s time to cleanse.
Wes Allison is the chief nutrition scientist and illustrator for The Taco Cleanse. Taco cleansing took his perspective on life from ‘meh’ to ‘yeah!’ He lives in Austin, Texas (where else?).
Stephanie Bogdanich blogs about vegan recipes, restaurant reviews, and Austin happenings at lazysmurf.wordpress.com. She enjoys whiling away her time in hammocks, especially in tropical locales, and although she loves breakfast tacos, she sometimes sleeps too late to get them.
Molly Frisinger is the writer behind Lone Star Plate, the blog of vegan Texas, where she covers vegan food, lifestyles, communities, and activism from El Paso to Houston. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and two cats, and she has strong opinions about chili (no beans!).
Jessica Morris is a vegan tattooed bunny-hugging hair colorist who runs Rabbit Food Grocery, an online and pop-up vegan shop based in Austin, Texas. She firmly believes that even those who hate to cook can enjoy the benefits of a Taco Cleanse.